My son turned one this past weekend. On Sunday, my husband and I threw a birthday party for him at a local kids venue. We confirmed the date, with both the venue and our guests, a few months ago. One of those guests was my father. Back when I informed him of the date, he told me he’d come.
A few days before the party, he asked if there was any way for me to reschedule it. I said no, as we’d already confirmed everything with the venue. My father then told me he’d be late to the party because there was an event at his girlfriend’s church on the same day, and she wanted him to attend.
I should say that my immediate family, including my father, is technically catholic, but none of us practice it. However, my father’s girlfriend is VERY religious. Like, Jesus as her phone wallpaper religious. Since they started dating (a little over a year ago), my father has been attending church with her on a semi-regular basis. He has explicitly told me he doesn’t like it, but does it to make her happy.
I told my father I was fine with him being late, as long as he came to the party at some point. He said he’d show up as soon as the church event was done.
A few hours before the party ended, my father texted me the event was still going, and he thought “it would be in poor taste” for him to leave early, so he probably wouldn’t be able to come. I didn’t hear from him again that day.
On Monday, my father called me to explain that the event went on for longer than he expected. He didn’t apologize, but asked if I was angry at him, and I said yes.
He said he had no way of knowing the event would last as long as it did, but that’s not what I’m upset about. I told him he still chose to prioritize an event he didn’t even want to attend over his grandson’s first birthday party, made several other choices that led him to completely miss the latter, and didn’t inform me about any of that until the last minute. All of those decisions were his, so the fact he ultimately didn’t come to the party was his fault.
My father is still refusing to apologize, and insists I have no right to be angry over something he had “no control over.”
I’m starting to feel odd about this. My husband is on my side, but my sister told me I’m being dramatic.
AITA?
